Bleeding Heart Pinko Commie

I really don't identify myself as a liberal, but over the course of the last twenty four hours a few conversations, bumper stickers and things on TV have got me feeling like I must be more liberal than I thought. I was once called a liberal by an adult in a very rude way. I was one of eight at dinner and the only one that supported an assault rifle ban as I recall, which may have been a bad opinion looking back on it, but I was young. Moving on. I was called a pinko commie at dinner by a guy I just met. I laughed it off and realized I might be in the minority occasionally when having dinner with people in the south. I also found out that diminutive UGA fans are closeted devil worshiping animal rapists. So here is how my day went.

The conversation: I was joking with a co-worker who happens to be conservative. He is on a diet and has an ab-lounger. That in its own right is pretty funny, but I suggested finding some Jane Fonda workout video's to give him some stimuli. He is also a little hard up for some sexual attention, this was intended to create a double entendre. His response was that Jane Fonda was on Inside the Actor's Studio last night. I liked Inside the Actor's Studio before it was a hit and they began having J. Lo, and Ben Affleck, and people who don't know craft from craft services. But the way he described Inside the Actor's Studio did it for me. He said and I quote, "She was on that liberal show Inside the Actor's Studio on that liberal ass Bravo." Now don't get me wrong here. I know Bravo supports the arts and ultimately alternative lifestyles in general. But I didn't see it as liberal. I just thought it was a channel about art and culture. Two things I generally support. I don't turn the channel to the Outdoor Life channel and see duck hunting and think, damn Republicans. I think hmm, I ain't watchin' no dang huntin'.

Next example. I almost keyed a car an hour ago. I went to my local Atlanta Bread Company, which I love. Is that liberal, they sell coffee and bread, some of the employees might oppose the world bank? Anyway, I leave and see a bumper sticker I've never seen before. I look and double take. It says Al Queda <3 Kerry. Oh yes I'm sure that's accurate. Al Queda shows Kerry speaches at recruiting meetings. See that Ali Akbar, John Kerry just said American ports should be made easier targets, and there John Kerry threw a brick at a woman he saw reading. Al Queda likes John Kerry because he doesn't care about the female vote. I had to be restrained, maybe as much because the licence plate had a Clemson border.

Final Example is a story on CBS news tomorrow night. Now I do know that CBS and other media outlets shade on the liberal side. I'm not blind. Do I watch the news to get the headlines spun by a liberal media, no. Anyway they have a report tomorrow about books being banned. No book should ever be banned first and foremost. This infuriates me. Trust me this is a conservative initiative no one can argue that. The only way a book should be censored is by its editor or publisher by turning it down. If I owned a publishing company I wouldn't publish a book on how to molest and exploit children on the black market in exchange for octopus ink. Simply wouldn't be a good investment. The stuff they want to ban might as well be burned in townsquare. While they burn Tennessee Williams and Arthur Miller and JD Salinger, I figure they should throw the Koran on the fire and please don't forget anything to do with monkeys.